Comments on: Reasons to Quit Marijuana #3 – Relationships

By: Q

Sun, 08 Jan 2012 11:10:19 +0000

Today is the day I quit. Been doing it for only 4 years but now I know what’s more important. Everything that has been said is excatly what I’ve been going thru but I have friends who’ve been holding me back. But I’m done with marjuana, drinking, pills and even smoking cigerettes so I can finally grow up and live a very good and promising for my family and most importantly myself.

By: Adam

Adam — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 19:20:49 +0000

Its New Years Eve 2011 and im sat at home on my own preparing for a night of sitting in front of the TV playing PS3 and getting lean, is this what I want??? Honestly it isnt, id much rather be out socialising and having fun, meeting new people and generaly enjoying myself. Instead of that ive just rolled a joint ready to smoke after writing this post.
The truth is I love weed so much and smoking it makes me feel great (in the short term) but ultimatley its at a massive sacrifice and im now at a cross roads as to where to turn.
Im 28 years old and like most of the posts ive read on here from guys, im single with no children. Ive smoked weed daily for the last 10 years, only giving up once for 2 months.
About 3 years ago on my 25th birthday to be exact, I sat in front of my PC, joint in hand and just felt utterley depressed. As if by miracle I started chatting to a girl I worked with (id always thought this girl was amazing). We had a long chat and I remember turning off my PC with a massive smile on my face. Over the course of the next 6 months we saw each other all the time, would chat for hours on thep hone and eventually we started going out properly. During this 6 months she knew I smoked weed however id always play it down and say it was only when I was with my friends and didnt smoke all the time. As things started to get serious I knew I had to make a choice, this girl or weed. The decision was easy for me and the girl won hands down everytime. It was strange as id wanted to stop smoking weed for a while but was so scared and the odd time id ran out of weed id sat up wide awake all night. Maybe I was lucky but when I did stop smoking i didnt really get cold swaets or the shakes or feeling light headed. My biggest problem was insomnia but I bought some sleeping tablets and to be honest id say after 3 days I was fine. I managed to last 2 months of not smoking it and although I missed it, I never felt tempted, this girl meant too much to me. That leads us to one fateful night when we had an argument over something silly and trivial. I left her house jumped in the car and the 1st thing I thought was weed. The reason I gave myself was Id only gave up weed for this girl and if she was going to be like that then I was going to smoke weed. I bought a 10 bag, rolled a joint, smoked about 3 drags and felt so stoned, it was like I’d had my 1st joint. We made up the next day and everything was fine but id cracked and smoked a joint. From then on it started again!! Id only smoke at weekends and then every couple of days. She hated weed with a passion but I guess she loved me so much that she put up with it for me. I was smoking nowhere near as much as I used to just 1 joint of an evening but she didnt like it still. We then decided to move in together. I agreed to before we did i wouldnt smoke weed in the week and ony at weekends which I did, however that only lasted about a month. After that id ask if could just have a little joint of an evening in the week. Again as much as she hated it, she’d let me. I then of course had to keep pushing the boat out and started asking every night if could smoke a joint. When she refused id wait for her to go t bed and then smoke without her knowing. Ultimatley it ruined our relationship. For a year we werent intimate, didnt have sex all because of me, i was just more interested in getting high and when I did get high I didnt want to know. She stayed with me that whole year but ultimnatley it just got to much. Im ashamed of the way i treated her and hate myself for it. I never paid her any attention and didnt even take her out for birthdays/valentines days etc. Ultimatley it got to the point where she couldnt take anymore and she said she was leaving. I was heartbroken but do you know what the stupidest thing was…. I looked at the whole situation and thought well I can get high without feeling guilty now and whenever I want. That was more important to me then saving my relationship so I let her go without even putting up a fight. Its been 2 years since she left me. Shes now with another guy and from what I hear is extrmeley happy and in love again. It doesnt surprise me, this girl was stunning and amazing in every way. Everytime think about her it makes me so sad and upset to relalise I threw away the best thing that ever happened to me.
Alot of you that have read this are probabaly thinking this is more suited for a break up forum however the point im trying to make is that it was weed that caused this. Weed was more important to me then anything else including her.
Weed has isolated me from my friends and family. Im extremely lucky that I have both as I know if I ever called my friends up or my family they’d do anything for me but truth is lie to all of them about what im doing, how im feeling. I feel so low but I could never let anyone I know, know that. I dont make committments to do anything as it has to fit in with me getting lean. Ive messed up countless opportunities with girls as ive cancelled on them so I can get high or ive got high before theyve come over and then spend the entire evening staring at the TV making no sort of conversation.
Im fairly intellignet, ive got a good job and am highly thought of within my organisation however I know I have held myself back and had I not been a stoner its no doubt in my mind I would be doing even better. Alot of my friends who were also stoners are now settling down, having kids, buying houses etc. Im still stuck in on my own, still smoking daily and hating it although id never admit that to any of them. I tell them I love the single life, the not having committments, being able to do what I want. The truth is im lying to them all. I want to go out, start socialising again, meet new people maybe meet a girl who made me feel like I did once before. The problem is that one thing stands in my way and thats smoking weed. Even now from writing this, I think about going out this evening yet all I want to do is get stoned. Ive been out all day so I havnt had a joint today, its 7pm currently, but its unheard of for me to go all day without a joint. Because I havnt smoked I am literally roasting for a joint but I know as soon as ive smoked it, i’ll stub it out, and just want to smoke another and then another and then another all basically to mask the reality of being a stoned and lonely guy whos sat in on his own but too scared to do anyhing about it. I know when I smoke weed i go into a shell. Im not my funny or confident self, I avoid any form of conflict even if its light hearted amongst friends. I even avoid making phone calls as i dont like talking to people when Im stoned. Im usually very depressed and sometimes just want to cry for no reason at all. Its ruining my life and I know that but im just so scared of giving up. I havnt got the added and incredible motiavation of having an amazing girl to get me through it, im totally on my own this time and I think thats what scares me the most. I guess the fact that im on this website and actually writing this leads me to beleive that I have taken the 1st steps and can hopefully conquer this but I think its going to be a very lonely and dark path id need to tread 1st and im not sure if can do it. Im going to make every attempt I can to do this although saying that im still going to smoke the joint I rolled before I started writing this (stupid isnt it after wrting all this im still going to smoke). Im sure everyone thats been through this before can understand my logic. Hopefully I can beat this. I know it will be much harder this time but if I did it before then surely I can do it again!!!!!! Finally would be great to read comments of people who are in the same position as me. Sometimes just knowing your not alone in a problem makes it that much easier so maybe we can help each other. Ive requested help from this and other websites so I pray that it works and im strong enough to do this. I know id feel so much better come the end of it, i just dont know if I can make it that far!!!!!

By: jess

jess — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 07:11:34 +0000

my 2 yr relationship ended this summer although she loved me and iI loved her she left me because i wouldnt smoke with her and she moved in with somebody that would smoke with her.when we were together it was hard she would come to visit me but go to the neighbors to smoke,or stay over with plans to do things on the weekend but when the weekend came shed start smoking in the morning and cancel the plans saying next weekend,it was a two yr. battle and i’m glad its over

By: Sarah

Sarah — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 00:59:07 +0000

I met my boyfriend through a mutual friend. Everything was perfect and he seemed like the nicest person. He had mentioned that sometimes he smoked pot but said it was only to be social. I never really understood just how damaging this drug could be to our relationship. Like the other stories he would hide the extent of his drug use. He never even smoked around me. But he would zone out often and never seemed to be present with me. He would hang out with his drug using friends instead of spending time with me. He even forgot our date one night and instead went to go get some food (he had the munchies) with his friend. When he would wake up in the morning it was as if he was looking at me for the first time. It was as if he had finally become sober after the previous nights high. I am a firm beleiver that pot can destroy a relationship. The drug is the priority not the other person. The user is in relationship with pot and not you. You will be hurt from their emotional unavailability as well as their constant need to put the drug first in their life. They will blame you for problems in the relationship even though they are too stoned to know you are upset. Get out of a relationship if they smoke pot… it is a very lonely road. Thank you for reading. God bless

By: Matty Mumps

Matty Mumps — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 11:18:09 +0000

Man is this site ever lame. It’s just you complaining about your personal issues and blaming them on weed. You control your own reality dude, and the marijuana experience is possibly that way for you because there are things you need to change about yourself to become a better individual. That’s how it was for me. I used to be that way in the early stages of my high life but have since found a way to transcend those awkward social effects by further realizing my true self. Be aware that it is all in your head because cannabis is extremely easy on the mind, much easier than alcohol. You are just learning a new way of perceiving reality and you have to make sure to integrate your new worldview into your way of functioning as an individual in a highly complex society. Since it is easy but not best to just choose to bliss out all the time, I am highly physically and mentally active while high on marijuana, which is all the time. I am highly educated and extremely open, friendly, and compassionate. I feel spiritually tuned, and excellently healthy. I am not a drug abuser – I used to abuse alcohol and I know what it’s like to abuse yourself with a drug because of that shit. I use mdma, lsd, and psilocybin mushrooms rarely but regularly at special times of the year and have never seen this as abuse. I do not see my habitual use of cannabis as drug abuse. These drugs have altered permanently my perception of reality in positive ways and I have grown into a new and better self because of my not always pleasurable (sometimes difficult) experiences with them, which I consider the most profound experiences I have ever had or am capable of having before attaining high meditative states of awareness which I seek as a yogi.